My Very Fourth Newsletter
The job market has shrunk; egg prices are up but at least the world hates us. I keep waiting. . . for . . . I dunno . . . Maybe Trump and Musk will have a Who’s Afraid of Virginia Wolf style divorce. Maybe England will take us back. I’m not the only one who engages in magical thinking. Remember when we all thought Melania would pull the curtain on her husband’s presidency. She was completely unaffectionate with him, blew off first-lady-should-show-up kinds of things, and even disappeared for a while. Free Melania we all wrote on social media. It turns out she’d reportedly had a kidney infection and when she recovered, her kidneys looked very perfect, especially in a tight sweater. What a disappointment.
Fast forward to a few months ago: the only thing standing between us and a resurgence of small pox was Cheryl Hines. With each revelation of RFK’s depravity, we anxiously awaited her condemnation. None came. And now we can buy Cheryl Hines MAHA (the H is for healthy –kill me) skincare.
Currently, all eyes are on the face of birthright citizenship herself: Usha Vance. She’s smart and she was disgusted by the January 6th people. Alas, the only Usha news I have seen was the detailed report of her Inauguration day outfit. And while I’ll admit she looked beautiful, she’s the same level monster as these other Real Housewives of the Oval Office.
Why do we women always expect the wives to be more rational, more humane than their husbands? Sometimes they just aren’t.
Distractions:
Snacks: Who thought to put trail mix on a cracker? Why, Trader Joe’s, that’s who. Trader Joe’s Trail Mix Crackers may look silly, but I dare you not to eat the whole bag . Cindy, my dear pal and Ruthless partner, is upset with me that I chose the cracker over the Oatmeal Cranberry Dunker. While they are also very good, she is wrong
Books: Real Americans is a great story. I’m a sucker for coming of age –and we see the evolution of three characters. Three for the price of one.
Movies: I finally watched King Richard, and it did not disappoint. And even though I know exactly how the story ends, it was gripping.
TV Shows: I tried Somebody Somewhere several times and I couldn’t get into it, but I pushed myself through season one and the first couple of episodes of season two and my big reward was season three. You can do it, too.
Something I Learned: Apparently, someone is in the process of developing a DNA based tool for neighborhood Karens (I proudly wear the mantle) to detect which doggy left its poop unscooped. That means we can all go full vigilante on these entitled pieces of shit who leave pieces of shit on the sidewalk.